"There's no point in spending your life in the pursuit of something that's easy." - Alice Kuipers

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

I Hate Logic

I suppose I'll begin by apologizing for how long it's been since I last posted. A lot's been going on and frankly, I didn't want to post until I knew for sure what we were going to do about Damage, the Great Dane we met on Saturday. I really wish this was an enthusiastic but slightly anxious post announcing the newest member of our family, but it's not.
Saturday night my husband and I drove out to meet our potential new family member. It went well enough, Damage was sweet, gentle and skinny as hell. He wasn't as good on a leash as his caretaker had previously led us to believe, but overall he was a lovely dog. As we drove home I couldn't deny the tight ball of stress in my gut. We talked the whole drive (well, I talked the whole drive), outlining the pros and cons. Damage was supposedly bad with small dogs (although from my what I'd seen, he had a remarkably gentle spirit), and my sister had a beagle. There would be certain costs in adopting him, we'd have to buy a crate, a prong collar, new leash, collar, food dishes and the added cost of feeding him; not to mention the fact that we'd like to get him fixed. Would Maddie feel jealous? Would there be less love for her than before? My husband was also concerned at the idea that the dog park wouldn't be an option for him. And then there was the clincher. My husband currently works fifty hour weeks. I couldn't walk two Great Danes by myself. How could we possibly walk them every day without someone there to help me?
And so, that sealed it. Despite the fact that he's a wonderful dog, and we like him very much, the logical choice was to say no. That doesn't mean it hurts any less, or that I feel any less horrible. But dogs need love, good nutrition, discipline, patience and exercise. We couldn't provide one of those. I hate thinking of him sitting alone in that kennel, waiting for a forever home to find him and love him, especially when ours would otherwise make such a good fit. And so, I've been too depressed to write until now. I've lagged on all fronts, NaNoWriMo, HerStory, and posting. I haven't called his caretaker yet, I don't want to make our 'No' official. But some things must be done. As much as I hate to do them.

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