"There's no point in spending your life in the pursuit of something that's easy." - Alice Kuipers

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

The Ruling

I've had to make a ruling at work. I don't mind if I came off rather bitchy either, it needed to be done. For some reason, I've been singled out in the office as someone you can tell to their face that they look like crap. Oh, not in so many words, but they say it just the same. If I got a dollar every time someone in the office told me I looked tired, or commented that maybe I have an iron deficiency, or asked me what was wrong with my eyes, I could just quit working and stay home all together. Sure, sometimes it's genuine concern, but I really don't care. I don't want to hear it. Which is why I told everyone, DO NOT COMMENT ON MY APPEARANCE UNLESS YOU HAVE SOMETHING NICE TO SAY.

First, it's just good manners. If you don't have anything nice to say, then just shut the hell up or however that saying goes. Second, it's stupid. Why are you pointing out to me that I look tired? I know how I feel. I happen to live inside this body and it keeps me well apprised as to how it's doing. Furthermore, I own a mirror. I know how I look. And I put a lot more care and attention into my appearance than you did this morning, that much I know for sure, because I have a great many of my own comments to make about your appearance, but I don't because I have good manners.

Why does this bother me so much? Mostly because I spend a lot of my day biting my own tongue and I expect the same courtesy in return. But also because I generally like how I look. I'm aware of my faults. I have inherited very pale skin as well as dark under eye circles. This can (and often does) make me look tired, despite being well rested and in good health. Science has yet to find a cure for dark under eye circles and although I've found products that help a lot, they will always be there. And I've accepted this. I don't need constant reminders, nor do I need suggestions that I should eat more red meat. I'm fine. Despite these flaws I like what I see in the mirror.

So, I stood up for myself and let everyone know that I wasn't okay with their unrestrained opinion sharing. You want to know the weirdest part? It's pretty well always the men who feel comfortable enough to insult me with their "concern". What about you? Have you ever had someone be a little too free with their opinions of your appearance? How did you handle it?

1 comment:

  1. Yes! I know exactly what you mean!! Most people are good but I have one work colleague who does that and it drives me nuts!