"There's no point in spending your life in the pursuit of something that's easy." - Alice Kuipers

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Expiry Date

It's been a rough couple of days. Since Monday morning I've been walking around in zombie mode, trying to process the news that the business I currently work for has been sold, with the new owners taking possession yesterday. It was completely unexpected, unplanned and frankly, I'm a little shell shocked. I still feel like at any moment I'm going to wake up and go into work to tell my boss what a crazy dream I had last night. But it's real, as is the realization that my job now has an expiration date.

The previous owners are going to stay on as managers for two years (thank God! I love my boss), and in the mean time everything should run as it had before, except for a certain inescapable duality that comes with this kind of transition. The new owners have just launched a new company wide program for accounting and are currently getting it set up and everything streamlined, as well as working out the necessary bugs. This should take a while, probably at least a year, maybe two but when it's done, I won't be needed anymore. Which brings me to my expiry date.

My job is no longer a certainty. It was the job I'd hoped to work at until my writing career took off and now, that might not happen. The thought of looking for another job makes me nauseated. I've bounced around from job to job so much over the past several years. I was so happy to have found someplace I could call home, a place I loved to get up and go to, with a boss I adored. I don't know if I can go through that search again. After all, it's not the job itself I adore, it's the workplace.

So, that leaves me with an uncertain timeline for a goal I don't know if I can accomplish. Can I build a writing career for myself before my current job disappears? I don't know. But in lieu of other options, I think it's time to go for broke. Keep your fingers crossed for me. I think this is going to be a bumpy ride.

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